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2003 Week 4 Report
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Our first full week of interleague games has
concluded, and the Hair Conference teams took it to their Lip Conference
counterparts. The Hairs won four out of five games this week, embarrassing
a cocky Lip division that had recently started a wagering pool based on
interleague victories. For lack of a better phrase, all that can be said
is: That'll Teach!
Here are the results for Week Four:
The Fat Bus (4-0)
defeated P.O.B. Pimps
(2-2), 106-90.
It looked like this one might be close on Monday night... for about 3 minutes.
Then Ahman Green ran 60 yards down the left side of the field and it was
Cya Lates, Pimps. To say that the Bus is rolling would be an understatement.
We'll see if they can keep up their winning ways in Week Five's matchup
against the Victorious Secrets, a team that they have only beaten once
in 7 years. The Pimps on the other hand had to play a few men short this
week due to injuries and byes. Their 90-point output was better than expected.
T.T.M.F. Little Johnny (2-2)
defeated Priestie Boys
(0-4), 77-58.
Little Johnny needed this win. It wasn't pretty, but they got the job done.
It's common knowledge that the Priestie Boys are the weakest team in the
league. McNabb is struggling, Boston is a basket case, and their other
receivers are of the bottom-of-the-barrell variety. That said, this team
can still turn things around...and in a hurry. They need McNabb to step
up and Priest to not play against Baltimore. It could happen. No really,
it could!
Karen's Komets (2-2)
defeated Faerie Fucks
(2-2), 83-71.
Marvin Harrison scored 34 points for the Fucks, but the other 8 starters
combined for only 37 additional points. That's not going to cut it. The
Komets survived all of their Week 4 byes and injuries and escaped with
a nice victory. Hurray for the Komets!
Vick's Vagines
(3-0-1) defeated Victorious
Secrets (1-3), 97-91.
The Vagines left an opening for the Secrets on Monday night, but they just
couldn't find a way to put it in. The Bulk of Vick's scoring came from
their trio of Moss, Lewis and Morgan this week -- but it was a stellar
day from K Jeff Wilkins that sealed the victory. Being the only Lip team
to win this week is a big plus for the Vagines. As for the Secrets, they
are dead last in scoring and still look to have the worst running game
in the league.
E-Z Money (1-3)
defeated The Steins
(2-1-1), 115-96.
Easy Stein! Err.... E-Z Money beats The Steins... convincingly. Of
course, it took a pair of career days from LaDanian and Manning to get
job the done. This could be the worst thing to happen to E-Z Money, as
they might actually believe their team is good now and stop trying to make
improvements. By losing their first game of the year, you know The Steins
are salts right now.
This report is going to be short, but I will
leave you with one final note:
Ron Benjamin took offense to the comments
made in last week's report. Although the league has a strong "No Apologizes"
rule, we would like to take this opportunity to salute the Private. Rumor
has it that Ron is looking to make a hostile takeover bid for one of the
weaker franchises in the league. If you're name is Rosebud, you might want
to start looking over your shoulder.
Out.
The Commish
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