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2003 Week 10 Report
"Would you like me to throw in Dillon
and Edge just for shits and giggles. It's a wonder that anyone ever trades
with you. You do realize that I already have Favre right? ...I think I
will just settle on playing Delhomme during my bye week and you can keep
both Bugler and Culpepper. Thanks for another reasonable trade offer though."
- The response 3 weeks ago by the owner
of T.T.M.F. Little Johnny after he was offered either QB Marc Bulger
or QB Daunte Culpepper in exchange for WR Eric Moulds
Ah, the leading canidate for the Peabody award
with another brilliant managerial decision. I don't know who was stupider,
T.T.M.F. Little Johnny for turning down the offer, or Karen's Komets for
proposing the trade. As you all know, Moulds hasn't done squat the last
three weeks (let alone all season) and Johnny has gotten 8 points, 2 points,
and 11 points the last three weeks from his starting QBs. Let's see, what
would have Culpepper scored for him had he made the deal? That would be
25, 26 and 40 points. Arguably, Little Johnny would have still lost two
of those games, but that's not the point.
Before you start laughing at this owner, you
better take a look below and make sure you're not listed in the following
list of the Stupidest Owner Decisons of Week Ten:
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#10
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Jamel White. It was bad enough that the Faerie
Fucks were forced to start RB James Jackson this week as the Browns
played against Kansas City on the road. But why in the world did The Fat
Bus think Jackson's backup (Jamel White) was going to do anything? Nice
bye week planning, Bus!
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#9
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The Steins seem to have forgotten that Matt
Hasselbeck is not the only QB on their roster. Hello! Trent Green, QB of
the NFL's highest scoring team, was playing a patsy this week. Morons.
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#8
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Vick's Vagines stupidity does not end with
their team name (Vick is not on their roster anymore, and he was probably
the last person someone should name their 2003 team after anyway). No,
they seemed to think that playing QB Drew Bledsoe on the road against
Dallas' top NFC defense was the right call this week. Helmet!
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#7
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You mean after ten weeks the Priestie Boys still think WR Quincy
Morgan should make a starting lineup? No wonder they are 0-10 !!!
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#6
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You mean after ten weeks the Priestie Boys still think WR Josh
Reed should make a starting lineup? No wonder they are 0-10 !!!
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#5
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Wow, T.T.M.F. Little Johnny lost a close one this week, as they
scored one less point then their opponent. I guess they picked the wrong
time to sub out their #1 defensive unit, the Dallas Cowboys, in favor of
their hometown favorite Cincinnati Bengal defense. The Bengals put up a
goose egg, while Dallas would have easily given them the victory. Nothing
like trying to be cute and costing yourself the season!
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#4
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Another team got cute this week and benched
starting QB Brad Johnson in favor of Cincinnati's Jon Kitna. Sure,
P.O.B. Pimps still won their game, but they cost themselves some valuable
scoring in the Overall Points race.
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#3
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Finneran. Nice backup receiver, Steins.
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#2
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Going for the hat trick here with The Steins... their defense has
scored a TD almost every week this season, but they haven't seen almost
all of these points. Why? Because they switch between Kansas City and Carolina
and always pick the wrong unit. 4 hands + 1 throat = Hahahaha.
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And the biggest bonehead move of the week...
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#1
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The Priestie Boys thought they might actually get a win this week!
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Here are the full results for Week Ten:
The Fat Bus (9-1)
defeated Faerie Fucks
(6-4), 100-88.
Both of these teams are playoff bound, but it's The Fat Bus that is looking
like the favorite to win it all. Despite the fact that we all know they
will choke when it counts most, it's nice to see them finally putting together
a solid season. We'll see if their top guns can stay healthy during the
stretch run. Don't look now but the Fucks are in trouble. RB Ricky
Williams has not done squat in a month and Harrison has a hurt hammy. Uh
oh. They need something good to happen and soon... or else it will be one
and done once again.
Karen's Komets (6-4)
defeated T.T.M.F. Little Johnny (3-7),
95-94. Nice Monday
night choke Mister Fav-ray. That will go down as an all-time chisel job.
It's sad that this is the way Little Johnny's season will be defined. Their
postseason hopes are now over. The Komets look like they'll be back in
this year's playoffs and that's just swell.
E-Z Money (5-5)
defeated Victorious Secrets
(3-7), 106-68.
E-Z Money is desperately trying to prove to the league that they are more
than just a shitty franchise who will never win a title. I really don't
think that is possible, since after all, they are a shitty franchise that
will never win a title. But this week they played the sorriest squad in
the league and got an easy victory. Maybe they might qualify for this year's
playoffs after all.
The Steins (6-3-1)
defeated Priestie Boys
(0-10), 88-71.
Laugh. Zero wins, ten losses. Are you kidding me? Where is Rueff when you
need him... because at least that guy could win one or two games each year
(allegedly). The Steins coast to another undeserved win and again find
themselves in position for a top playoff seed. Will it matter? Probably
not, since they are having a hell of a time making the correct roster decisions
on a weekly basis. I can only imagine what blunders they will perform when
the chips are on the line. Is J.J. Stokes still available for a waiver pick
up?
P.O.B. Pimps
(6-4) defeated Vick's Vagines
(5-4-1), 113-80.
Pimpin' ain't easy. Well it's not easy unless your squad of overachieving
stiffs scores a lot of touchdowns. That way, you will find winning is easy,
especially if you are P.O.B. Believe me, these guys aren't going away.
They will be a force to be dealt with in the playoffs, even if Marcel Shipp
is starting for them.
Three weeks to go. It's crunch time, girls.
The Commish
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