As predicted, the Week Three outcome for 4
teams came down to the last play of Monday Night's game. As the Redskins
sputtered on their final 4th quarter snaps, the hopes of going 3-0 were
squashed for both The Fat Bus and The Endzone Dancers. It must have definitely
been a "chiseling" feeling for both squads to see Brad Johnson
unable to hook up with Irving Fryar for a last minute pass completion.
As it turned out, the two teams both suffered a 2-point loss to a division
rival.
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Feature game of the
week
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Akili's All-Stars (2-1)
defeated The Fat Bus (2-1),
79-77. In this key Lip Conference matchup, Akili's All-Stars comes away
with the narrow victory, despite displaying extremely poor managerial skills.
Although they now own a share of the Lip Conference lead, the All-Stars
should be embarrassed for playing injured K Brett Conway. It was public
knowledge late last week that ex-Bucanner Michael Husted would be signed
by the Redskins for the Monday game. Also, it was a bonehead decision to
start rookie WR Travis Taylor on the road against Miami (in a semi-hurricane
no less!) when WR Raghib Ismail was available to play against a much
weaker defense. As fate would have it, the blunders were not enough to
give The Fat Bus the victory. Because of injuries and the bye week, the
Bus was forced into playing the league's oldest receiver, Irving Fryar.
And the king of geriatrics just didn't have enough game in him to squeeze
out those last few points. Next week Akili's All-Stars faces The Savants,
while The Fat Bus matches up against Dirty Sanchez.
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Here are the rest of the results for Week
Three:
Santana's No Randy! TNT© (2-1)
defeated Jo-Boo's Browns Backers (0-3),
65-45. This was one ugly game. Santana's No Randy! TNT©
suspected they might have an easy matchup this week, but they had no idea
it would be this easy! Despite scoring the 2nd lowest amount of points
during Week Three, they still wound up with the biggest margin of victory!
The Browns Backers, undoubtedly the weakest team in the league, have no
one to blame but themselves. In addition to the much publicized "sale"
of top RB Edgerrin James, the Backers once again made the mistake
of drafting and trading for players who are older and prone to severe injuries.
When your two running backs are playing on repaired ACLs, and your quarterback
is playing on a ruptered achilles tendon from the prior season -- it's
not that unlikely that one of them will miss their weekly game. Get a clue,
Jo-Boo! Next week Santana's No Randy! TNT© plays winless
Team TBD while the Browns Backers match up against Bullseye (and ex-franchise
player Edgerrin James).
The Savants (1-2)
defeated The Endzone Dancers (2-1),
97-95. This was a game The Savants desperately needed to win, as falling
to 0-3 in the Hair Conference would have been almost an impossible hole
from which to to climb out. Luck was on their side on Monday night, as
RB Emmitt Smith picked up just enough points to hand The Endzone Dancers
their first loss of the season. Despite the season-high 32 running back
points from Marshall Faulk, The Endzone Dancers now move into a four-way
logjam at the top of the Hair Conference. They are joined by Dirty Sanchez,
Bullseye, and Santana's No Randy! TNT©. Next week The Savants
face off against Akili's All-Stars while The Endzone Dancers meet the The
Funhouse Slaps.
Dirty Sanchez (2-1)
defeated Bullseye (2-1),
87-82. RB Stephen Davis blew up for 22 points on Monday Night, allowing
Dirty Sanchez to administer the Monday Night Chisel to Bullseye, who had
to play without star RB Edgerrin James -- who was sitting out with
a bye. A deciding factor in this game was the four field goal performance
of Dirty Sanchez' K Joe Nedney. Nedney replaced injured Jason Elam of Bullseye,
who were forced into playing their second placekicker -- who just happened
to be facing the league's best defensive unit in Tampa Bay. Funny how these
things work out, isn't it Stein? Next week Dirty Sanchez plays The Fat
Bus and Bullseye has a bye... err... they go against Jo-Boo's Browns Backers.
The Funhouse Slaps (2-1)
defeated Team TBD (0-3),
69-67. Team "To Be Defeated" just can't catch a break! Last week,
they had to go up against Akili's All-Stars - who broke an all-time league
record with 149 points. This week, they had to play without their best
player (WR Marvin Harrison) and they lose their game by a mere two
points. Next week won't get any easier for the winless team, as they must
play Santana's No Randy! TNT©. The Funhouse Slaps earned
the victory on the weight of two solid running back performances from Kevin
Faulk and Ricky Williams. With the struggles they are having at the quarterback
position, the Slaps will need such production to keep at their winning
ways. Next week, they face off against The Endzone Dancers.
Next week features five interleague matchups,
and with an 0-3 deficit so far this season, the Lip Conference will need
to kick things up a notch to avoid the ridiculing they received last season.
Best of luck to all teams next week!
The Commish
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